I no longer have a relationship with my Dad. It was a choice I made for the good of my own mental health. My parents split up when I was 5, and divorced when i was 7. Initially we saw my Dad, for weekends etc, but when I was 9 he disappeared. It turns out he moved to Canada with his wife.
He got back in touch the week before I turned 18, since then I had tried to have a relationship with him, I even visited him in 2006. Then after some struggles to have a two way relationship and some issues with his interfering wife, I decided I was done trying in Dec 2012.
What I would say is he's not a bad person, he's just a rubbish Dad. It's very clear that I am not his priority. So I rarely think about him anymore, I focus on the family I do have around me, including my awesome friends.
Just under two weeks ago, he got in touch via Facebook to let me know his father, my Granddad, had passed away. Whilst I was glad he had reached out to tell me this, I was frustrated and annoyed because he misspelled my name on purpose (he must have spelled it correctly to find me online!). My name was slightly different when I was born, I changed my name when I was 9. It just felt like yet another example of not showing me respect, him getting a dig in.
Well just due to the timing, I am getting 20+ emails a day from all companies saying "Fathers Day" is coming. I usually don't even notice the day, but it's just reminding me of how even now at 34 my Dad knows how to push my buttons and annoy me. It just makes letting go of the anger much harder.
Which got me thinking about the insensitivity of mass email, for all those who have a difficult (or no) relationship with their parents on Mothers Day and Fathers Day. And I came across an article about women who were pregnant and suffer a miscarriage, but are plagued with online adverts and mass mailings reminding them of their loss. There should be a way to opt out of marketing related to unwanted reminders.
- Do you agree?
- How do you manage what impacts you?
- How can we improve the invasion of marketing on our day to day lives?
Let me know,